I’m finally starting to do what I’ve always wanted to do. In fact it might just be what I was meant to do, my purpose. Right now it’s only baby steps. But any steps at all are more than I ever imagined was possible. You see, if you spend enough time lying on the ground unable to get up or getting knocked back down the minute you do, then you begin to stay down. You begin to believe that’s where you’ll always be and to even believe that’s where you belong: kicked and stepped over. Just a useless heap in everybody’s way. It’s a posture that once assumed, is hard to overcome. But not impossible.
So what am I doing that I’ve always wanted to do? I’m reaching out to those ‘heaps’ to help them rise, stand and take baby steps of their own. Steps together toward who they were meant to be. And who is that, you ask? Although different for each, it’s anything but a heap.
Maybe you’ve heard my story already: I’m a nonspeaking autistic who had no meaningful future in sight untilI I learned to spell out letters on a letterboard to communicate at age 16. Before that time I endured years of emotional and mental trauma because I was misunderstood and mistreated, yet could not set the record straight. After that time I endured years of emotional and mental trauma because as I tried to set the record straight I met resistance or downright disbelief.
How do you suppose that affected my self worth? My stress and anxiety? My body regulation? My sensory and motor differences? My relationships? My participation in life? My hope? My very humanity?
I’ll answer for you: they all want to hell. And to climb out of that pit I needed a hand. A hand from those who understood and from those who didn’t understand but believed me just the same. As partners we climbed out together. No nonspeaker left behind.
I’m on a mission now to partner with any nonspeaker in a heap of misunderstanding, of body out of control, of fighting/flighting/freezing, of motor loops rendering them trapped, of crushing self loathing, of hopelessness for their future. This partnering is my purpose and my passion. Baby steps that will grow to leaps and bounds, that will grow to nonspeakers no longer bound.
You’ll be hearing more about this quest at qUirk, my soon to be launched mentoring service for nonspeakers and their families.
Think about it: if an autistic who can’t speak and couldn’t communicate meaningfully at all for the first 16 years of his life, can rise from his heap to speak into his own life and into the struggling lives of other nonspeakers, then what’s your excuse for still being on the ground?
Too hard? Too much effort? Too unfair? Too many tries and fails?
Too many excuses.
Get up. Then stay up. Find a hand to help you up until you can manage on your own. Mine is reaching out…